Okay, look at the third clip from the left on the top...
and now look at Ryan.
weird. Ryan's even wearing a similar shirt.

It's almost 3:00 in the morning, but I can't sleep now. I admit, I probably would fall asleep if I actually went to bed, I am tired, but it would seem somehow, insensitive. I just watched Blood Diamond. It's one of those movies where, at the end, everyone sits in silence and watches the credits. Even when the credits are done, you sit. You don't really know what to think. Your mind is a jumble of images, emotions, words. Anger at the people who could be so evil. So unfeeling. Utter saddness for all those millions who have lost loved ones, all those brutally murdered, all the innocent children turned cruel and ruthless in the rebel armies, all those who will suffer in the future. It seems this evil will never end. Shame. Shame at the state of our human nature, that we are able to treat eachother in this way. Shame at myself for sitting here in my nice house, in my peaceful country, with all I could ever want or need, with my petty problems such as what to wear in the morning. Shame, knowing that though this will be on my mind for a few days, I will soon forget it and go back to living my life, just as I always have.
It's so selfish of me to want to go on living my life, to want Jesus to postpone his return so I can have my family, my own children, maybe even grandchildren, while this endless pain and suffering goes on. While this evil in the world continues its rampage and multiplies its destruction. While countless millions are crying out to God for an end to this cruelty.
And why do we westerners watch these movies, feel a little sad, but then continue sitting on our asses while the killing continues. While we often continue the killings with our selfish wants. While we have the power to stop it.
I don't understand how my life can seem so good, so perfect, when this world is so evil. I don't understand why an absolutely perfect, holy God would care to save any from such a wretched human race such as us. I don't understand how he, being love itself, can bear to let this continue. I don't understand.

Clarification

I need to clarify something. 300 was not a good movie. It had some good elements such as a really cool sound track, a neat surreal feel, and it had cool filming techniques for the battle scenes; but other than that, there was a lot of killing (fake looking killing, but killing none-the-less), an explicit sex scene, and some other very sketchy sexual stuff. It really didn't have any higher purpose than killing, sex, and cool film techniques. So I'm not endorsing it in the least. Don't watch it.

On a lighter note, this week-end "Amazing Grace" a movie about Wilberforce, the guy who brought about the end of the slave trade in Britain, is coming out. It looks like it will be really good, so you should all watch it. Here's the website so you can watch the trailer.

I'm going to go to bed now. You might not hear from me for a while because I have 5 papers, a presentation, and a midterm yet to do before classes are done in three weeks. My procrastination is finally coming back to bite me.

Lessons in Art

This is really long, so I don't expect anyone to read it. Except mom. You wanted to know if I am learning anything out here, so here's what I learned in art class:

I recently went to the National Art Gallery of Canada, in Ottawa. In the section of "Modern Art" I was confronted with images and displays I would never consider art: a bike wheel hanging from the ceiling, a painting consisting of lines of three different colors, and a mish-mash of distorted, abstract faces and symbols. And it gets worse: a pile of bricks, photos of other photos, porn, even animal parts in cement or seimen on a string. Many of us will look at these displays and shake our heads in disgust, wondering how these things ever got away with being called "art". Art no longer takes skill, or some higher purpose, it is simply a statement meant to shock the viewer.
The arts have been deeply flawed by wrong assumptions about art and about who we are as human beings. Since the enlightenment, the age in which man came to see himself as the center of the universe, the artist has now come to be considered a creator, at the a level with God. Art became the creation of something new, rather than the reflection of God's creation. We have come, essentially, to an idolatry of creativity. The point of creating a work of art is "the shock of the new", creating something that hasn't been created before, or doing something that hasn't been done before.
Art also reflects the relativism of our age- whereas truth is relative to the individual, so is, according to philosopher David Hume, beauty. So what one person might call garbage or porn, another might call art. With the start of Bohemianism, the artist was no longer expected to conform to the conventional societal standards of normalcy. So we get the "emo" styles meant to shock the older generations, the unconventional styles of punk and rock-and-roll, and the art in our galleries today.
We as Christians have also failed. We have failed, for the most part, to redeem the arts for God's creation. God's call to go and make disciples of all nations included redeeming art galleries, theaters, and art galleries for Christ.
Today, if you go into a Christian book store, you will find examples of Christian art. You will see "cute" paintings of flowers and cottages in quiet meadows, of a mother with her children, or a family dinner; many which will have bible verses under them. These are paintings with the purpose of making you feel good. Look at the art of Thomas Kinkade, a popular christian artist: pictures of a beautiful, serene America which never existed. Much Christian music is the same. It is fluffy lyrics singing of God's love and how thankful we are, but ignoring the brokenness of the world we are living in. This is Kitsch. "The portrayal of a world without shit" (my prof's words, not my own). The portrayal of a world without scandal, without brokenness, without sin. It is a lie.
Christians have missed the point of art. A painting shouldn't be a cute picture to make us feel good. A song shouldn't be sung merely for an emotional high. Art goes past the lyrics and the brush strokes to an experience of struggling with questions of what it means to be human. It is the yearnings, the confusions, the doubts, the hopes of a sinful human being in a sinful world. Even most modern art has gotten this right. It crudely, without shame, represents this secular cultural environment that we do, in fact, inhabit. It is honest. It is not looking through a window, a xeroxed copy of sights seen, or a portrayal of something false, it is an exploration of color and line, and of what things are, of human nature and of life.
In Christian art we also find the representations of biblical stories, metaphors for the faith (a shepherd, Jesus knocking on a door), or images of Christ to aid in worship. These are simple messages, trying to present a theme clearly. We have our whole separate Christian culture with Christian t-shirts, coffee-mugs, bumper stickers, music, and paintings. But with these things we aren't speaking to our culture at all.
The early Christians had it right. The images they used were signs and symbols of the cultures they were living in which they subverted to have a christian message. The art was distinctly christian while not being counter-cultural. The people of that time could relate to the art and learn from it. Then at the time when the east and western church split, art became something only for the church. Beautiful icons and paintings were created, but they were nothing more than signs and symbols telling the biblical story or windows to a higher spirituality. And with the renaissance, as art became more and more secularized, Christians retreated into their christian circles and Christian art increasingly became crutches for meditation and elaborate posters for the church. And it became less honest: Arian Christs, baby Jesuses who never cried, and Haloed saints.
A wrong interpretation of the words of Martin Luther and Calvin turned the protestant church completely away from the arts. Artists were marginalized and art was looked down upon as something only for the secular world. Now, today as we try to bring the arts back, we have no experience, no tradition to work upon. We've forgotten what it takes to make good art. Since we've separated ourselves from the world, we don't how our culture has gotten to where it is now, and we don't know how to fix it.
I'm not saying this Christian art is wrong. It's okay to want to listen to a song simply to lift you up and make you feel closer to God. Sometimes it's good: we all need to take time to separate ourselves from the secular world and allow God to speak to us by focusing on him. And its okay to have a painting because it makes you feel like the world's a better place. But often it is cheap. It's not telling the truth about our human condition. Jesus is not my "all in all", I don't "worship [Him] with all my heart", "live for [Him] alone" or honor him in all I do. I wish it were true, but I'd be lying if I said I'm even close to that point. That world of untouched meadows and perfect family harmony is something we should all hope for. But it isn't a reality. All of this world is corrupted by sin. This includes my family and my personal life. Most of the time I live for myself, not for God, and I follow the ways of the world in the way I dress, the music I listen to, the movies I watch, the way I talk. I fight with my parents and my brothers and sisters. I'm sure every Christian can relate. We need more bands like Jars of Clay and Caedmon's Call which have deep, honest lyrics about human struggles and our brokenness. Everyone, even non-christians can relate to them.
We need secular art made by Christians which will convey truths of God's rule over everything, give hope amongst the brokenness, and encourage proper living. This can be movies, paintings, music and more. These don't have obvious messages with the "chistian culture" feel, which will be ignored by the world, but they speak subtly of the truths of God's word.

Hey look! It's spring!... oh no, just kidding.

It was spring once. It's a vague memory now, but a good one. Birds singing, bright sun warming my face, new buds and green grass. But that was a long time ago. This white world we live in now, have lived in for so long, clouds my memory, pushes out any recollection of... the sun.

It's actually sunny right now and quite warm, so that's kind of an exaggeration. But really! I was outside in shorts coming back from the gym three days ago. And I wasn't cold! It was beautful outside! And then two days later the temperaure dropped to minus who-knows-what, and there was a cruel wind threatening to take any uncovered appendages to the elements. And it was snowing again! In one day the world went from green to covered in a layer of snow, a couple of inches deep. Oh cruel, cruel world.

On that note, here's some banquet pictures as promised:

Our beautiful dorm:

Dorm 34 hotties:

Look at Tim's sick tan!
creepy eyes! haha. Danielle dyed her hair pink just before the banquet. It was sweet.
"we are cool"

D-24!
awww cute!
oh what fun!

It's been a while

I really wanted to wait until I had Ree's banquet pictures before I posted again, but I sill haven't gotten the pictures because I'm stupid, and I want to blog now. It's been a while since I've spilled my guts into the vast expanse called the internet. Scary thought. Spilling my guts, and how vast the internet is. Like the stars. Unfathomable.

Great times since my last post. A little bit of winning with the British Quiz night. The Radical Red Rockets kicked some sorry ... Guild. Haha. It was fun to beat the guys, even though (sorry Katrina) we had a lot of help. Then "dessert" with the dorm and Angie- who knew Jack Astors only had one dessert? They just like to tempt you with a bunch of pictures of other delicious looking dishes. I like appetizers better anyway though. We watched 300 on thursday. I'm not endorsing it to anyone because i might be excommunicated (just kidding, it wasn't that bad), but I will say that it was well done and had a really cool soundtrack. And then... wait for it... The BANQUET!!!! Banquet was a ton of fun: dressing up, good food, and lots of dancing. Good times. Pictures will come sometime. And just for fun, here's some sweet videos:

Okay Ryan...

Ryan, just so you know, writing a post is very emotionally and psychologically draining. So, it takes a very strong person to blog often. I admit, somtimes I am weak, and then the posts are few. But since you keep complaining that you have nothing to read, I will give it a shot. This one is for you.

So...Ryan Gelensye. I loved him probably from the moment I met him (not that kind of love Tim). He's a very likeable guy. He's always fun to be around and can always make me smile, and very often laugh. He has a quirky, energetic personality which often leaves me shaking my head, wondering if anyone else on earth would ever do whatever he just did, but his antics definately will leave me with many good memories. Some of the highlights: his movies, him dancing (very passionately) to U2 by himself, "singing" every word of too little too late by JOJO and other such songs with Matt, his made-up songs with the three guitar chords he knows, his animated stories, him playing secret agent in his dorm (again by himself), randomly doing Kung Foo on a box or some unseen opponent, "props", his famous inappropriate comments... there's so much more that I can't remember right now, or that I just shouldn't post. Ryan is an aspiring film critic and talented film-maker, he is also an excellent musician (crazy people who are good without ever taking lessons). He is probably the biggest procrastinator I know, starting to write papers at like 1:00 AM, but somehow he always gets his work in on time. And he is probably the best at sleeping in class, maybe that was more last year though. Um, an excellent hockey player, very muscular, nice hair...

My Redeemer experience definately would not have been the same without Ryan Gelensye. You are a great friend Ryan, thanks.

Help!

Someone kidnapped my philosophy prof and put Plantinga in his place. I think they hoped I wouldn't notice, but I'm pretty observant. The man standing up there and mumbling someting incoherent is "larger" than my usual prof and has white hair and a mustache. And he's not drinking juice. hmmm. "Hey you! I know your tricks! Tell me where you put our prof and I won't go Jack Bauer on you." ...I've always wondered what they put in those closets in the room. I hope he's still alive in there. Maybe I should sneak out while I still can...